Comments on: CRS: Can’t Remember —-. http://andrightlyso.com/2007/04/25/crs-can%e2%80%99t-remember/ Live Free Or Die Mon, 15 Mar 2010 04:22:48 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Eric http://andrightlyso.com/2007/04/25/crs-can%e2%80%99t-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-62690 Eric Sun, 29 Apr 2007 05:59:42 +0000 http://andrightlyso.com/2007/04/25/crs-can%e2%80%99t-remember/#comment-62690 The main thing about the recovery process from brain injury of any sort, is that it cannot be "fought" or conquered through an act of will. The most terrible word in the world is "acceptance"; but the dreaded word should never be the end of the sentence. The end of the sentance must be "--for right now". The body doesn't have a perfect map of where all of the connections are supposed to be, it does the repairs using a "trial and error" process. All one can do is try to be calm, and try to keep the frustration and anger at bay. The resources are limited, and the same resources the body uses to move stuff around and establish new connections are used up when the person pushes things too hard and gets frustrated and angry. The idea is to strive for improvement gently--for lack of a better way of saying it--to ask the body to try to do the repairs and attempt to maintain a focus on the tiniest of positive results. When there is any positive change, the person who is attempting to recover must celebrate it. Being grateful, and happy over improvement is the only way of providing positive feedback to his body for going in the right direction. This may sound trite, but it works. Unfortunately, it can not be done by anyone but the patient himself. I struggled with some pretty bad damage for years, and had little positive result as long as I had the rage over the damage in the first place. I was filled with frustration and rage--and stark raving sober at the time. When I finally was able to lower my expectations "--for right now", and accept that I had limitations "--for right now" and concentrated upon making each day worth living as I was experiencing it at the time, there was rapid change. Some of that could be explained away by saying that many times in clinical studies there have been cases with no significant change for long periods, followed by dramatic improvements. But, after having gone through the experience, I was in an auto accident and had to learn how to remember and read for a second time in Adulthood. Taking the above approach from the beginning of the process, I was able to regain the ability to read for pleasure and utilize my intellect fairly well. Unfortunately, short-term memory is pretty well shot. I bought improvement with Cylert for a while, but over time it lost efficacy. Other stimulants did not improve clarity and performance nearly as well, nor has Strattera had the same effect on performance. (I find that when my hand writing gets too bad, or my hands begin to shake, or my eyes lose sharp focus, that a short break--and a short walk is sufficient to restore everything if I haven't pushed it too hard.) It was determined that I had ADD/ADHD before the brain damage, and the damage and subsequent strokes (from the auto accident) intensified it. Pace is important, there is a tendancy to become too intense; to start thinking more rapidly when getting frustrated and spin-up out of control into anger and rage. It is very difficult to maintain an awareness of pace, and as I have found, it is much easier to lose that habit of pacing oneself than to build it up. (I have been a bear lately.) I can honestly say that there is nothing more intimate than having a brain that doesn't work. It becomes a matter of life or death to teach the skill of looking for moments of beauty and joy in each day; to make each day something that trancends endurance into something worth living. I needed to write this. I needed to be reminded of the things that I have to do in order to maintain a healthy attitude and pay proper attention to the pace at which I think and live--all of it was hard won, and I have back-slided quite a bit. Eric The main thing about the recovery process from brain injury of any sort, is that it cannot be “fought” or conquered through an act of will. The most terrible word in the world is “acceptance”; but the dreaded word should never be the end of the sentence. The end of the sentance must be “–for right now”. The body doesn’t have a perfect map of where all of the connections are supposed to be, it does the repairs using a “trial and error” process. All one can do is try to be calm, and try to keep the frustration and anger at bay. The resources are limited, and the same resources the body uses to move stuff around and establish new connections are used up when the person pushes things too hard and gets frustrated and angry. The idea is to strive for improvement gently–for lack of a better way of saying it–to ask the body to try to do the repairs and attempt to maintain a focus on the tiniest of positive results. When there is any positive change, the person who is attempting to recover must celebrate it. Being grateful, and happy over improvement is the only way of providing positive feedback to his body for going in the right direction. This may sound trite, but it works. Unfortunately, it can not be done by anyone but the patient himself.

I struggled with some pretty bad damage for years, and had little positive result as long as I had the rage over the damage in the first place. I was filled with frustration and rage–and stark raving sober at the time.
When I finally was able to lower my expectations “–for right now”, and accept that I had limitations “–for right now” and concentrated upon making each day worth living as I was experiencing it at the time, there was rapid change.

Some of that could be explained away by saying that many times in clinical studies there have been cases with no significant change for long periods, followed by dramatic improvements. But, after having gone through the experience, I was in an auto accident and had to learn how to remember and read for a second time in Adulthood. Taking the above approach from the beginning of the process, I was able to regain the ability to read for pleasure and utilize my intellect fairly well.

Unfortunately, short-term memory is pretty well shot. I bought improvement with Cylert for a while, but over time it lost efficacy. Other stimulants did not improve clarity and performance nearly as well, nor has Strattera had the same effect on performance. (I find that when my hand writing gets too bad, or my hands begin to shake, or my eyes lose sharp focus, that a short break–and a short walk is sufficient to restore everything if I haven’t pushed it too hard.) It was determined that I had ADD/ADHD before the brain damage, and the damage and subsequent strokes (from the auto accident) intensified it. Pace is important, there is a tendancy to become too intense; to start thinking more rapidly when getting frustrated and spin-up out of control into anger and rage. It is very difficult to maintain an awareness of pace, and as I have found, it is much easier to lose that habit of pacing oneself than to build it up. (I have been a bear lately.)

I can honestly say that there is nothing more intimate than having a brain that doesn’t work. It becomes a matter of life or death to teach the skill of looking for moments of beauty and joy in each day; to make each day something that trancends endurance into something worth living.

I needed to write this. I needed to be reminded of the things that I have to do in order to maintain a healthy attitude and pay proper attention to the pace at which I think and live–all of it was hard won, and I have back-slided quite a bit.

Eric

]]> By: Papa Ray http://andrightlyso.com/2007/04/25/crs-can%e2%80%99t-remember/comment-page-1/#comment-62386 Papa Ray Sat, 28 Apr 2007 03:49:06 +0000 http://andrightlyso.com/2007/04/25/crs-can%e2%80%99t-remember/#comment-62386 Huh...and all those years I just thought I had that PTSD thingie and that drinking and chasing women would cure it. Of course the VA said I had to sit around with other Vets and talk all my problems away. Nobody told us that having your brain rattled around caused problems. Guess they were too busy trying to prove there was nothing really wrong with us. Papa Ray West Texas USA Huh…and all those years I just thought I had that PTSD thingie and that drinking and chasing women would cure it. Of course the VA said I had to sit around with other Vets and talk all my problems away.

Nobody told us that having your brain rattled around caused problems. Guess they were too busy trying to prove there was nothing really wrong with us.

Papa Ray
West Texas
USA

]]>