What is she suing for? Damages? Explain them to me. Did he have a disability due to the fall- (which is highly unlikely medically speaking)?

HAGERSTOWN, Md. — A Hagerstown woman who filed suit against Wal-Mart is asking for damages for herself and her son, who, she says, was born prematurely after she fell in a store.

Radhia Haj-Mabrouk contends in the suit filed Tuesday in Washington County Circuit Court that she slipped on water on the floor in the Wal-Mart on Garden Groh Boulevard in August 2005, fell and was hurt.

Haj-Mabrouk was pregnant then and her son was delivered by emergency C-section later that day, the suit says.Haj-Mabrouk is seeking $1 million on her behalf and $2 million on behalf of her son, Lofti Haj-Mabrouk, according to the lawsuit.

A Wal-Mart spokeswoman said Friday that Wal-Mart had not yet been served with the lawsuit.

Hmm. I am pretty skeptical on this, simply because of the lack of details. Just because someone falls in a store, doesn’t mean they have a right to sue. ACTUAL HARM must have occurred in order to take legal action. Now, seeking legal remedy for the costs of the emergency delivery might be in order here. The article states “she was hurt”- one would think when it comes to the anti Wal Mart crowds of this country, the gory bloody details would be well known. Then again the Wal Mart haters seem to have disappeared- I wonder if they’re all working for Obama with his campaign.

My mother always warned me to stay away from strange men offering candy.

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Ahh..I knew, just knew there would one day be a medical defination of my ailment. I’ve always been called a nymph, but that didn’t do me justice.

This does:

In 1995, Jeannie Allen didn’t quite know how to tell her then-husband about her embarrassing health problem.

Her primary care physician told her it was all in her head and recommended she see a psychologist.

But Allen, now 56, knew better. She was suffering from persistent genital arousal disorder, also known as persistent sexual arousal syndrome.

Yes. I know how she feels. Literally. I’m ticked off they call this a health problem though…cause it’s not.

“I simply woke up one morning and it was there,” Dearmon said. “It bothered me from the very beginning. I had never had sexual sensations in the clitoral area that were separate from my mind or emotions.”

At first, the sensations occurred only in the morning. Dearmon went to her gynecologist, who thought her baby’s increasing size might be pressing on her pelvic region.

But the birth of her son, Jonah, provided no relief. By that time, the sensations were happening morning, noon and night.

Dearmon said the only way to rid herself of the uncomfortable sensations was to masturbate to three consecutive orgasms.

It caused some strain on her sex life with her husband, Jeremy, who was supportive, but also frustrated.

She needed sex more often. I’m telling yah that’s what cures this. How can such a thing cause a strain?? I don’t get that.

“My whole life had been altered. I couldn’t even go out to lunch with friends,” she said. “To achieve three consecutive orgasms takes a long time. I felt my whole life being robbed.”

Life being robbed? For real? Not me. These orgasm attacks just intensified my drive and kept my X busy and content as hell. Considering that the majority of women never truly even have an orgasm (even though they fake it so it looks good)- we should be calling ourselves lucky. And the men in our lives too!

This one’s been around for awhile and most have seen it. But because it’s a warm sunny Wednesday afternoon I thought I’d post it for fun. Not TOO bad, but I would call it NSFW.

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About the flu, and vaccines to protect us from it:

WASHINGTON (AP) — Scientists have pinpointed the cradle-to-grave path that flu takes as it sweeps the globe every year — starting with the birth of new strains in Asia and ending when the virus burns out in South America.

In between, influenza catches a ride to North America and Europe about six to nine months after a new strain emerges in Asia, a pattern that promises to help health authorities better prepare each winter’s flu vaccine.

Already, monitoring is being beefed up in parts of East and Southeast Asia “as fast as we can” in hopes of more accurately spotting strains poised to jump continents, said Dr. Michael Shaw, a flu specialist with the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Now, “we know the part of the world to look in, and the probable time of the year to look,” he said.

I always knew Asia was good for something: Providing the world with endless, nasty, disgusting germs that mutate into bugs and flus and other illnesses. Do they wash their hands over there? I don’t think so.

Sometimes life gets very strange indeed…

Military Plane Crashes in Poland After Flight Safety Conference; 20 Dead

Twenty members of the Polish military, including a brigadier general, a colonel and four crew members, died in the worse Polish military disaster in over 30 years.

The irony, though, is that the plane was ferrying passengers home following a conference on flight safety! The news reports did not state whether the flight crew were among the conference participants.

Anger-Management Teacher Breaks Student’s Finger

A middle-school teacher got into a wrestling match during class with one of his students that began as horseplay but ended up with the teacher, who the student called his “favorite teacher”, breaking the student’s index finger and the teacher’s subsequent resignation. Whether someone got angry during the tussle remains under dispute.

The class during which this occurred - anger management! The story fails to state why teacher-student wrestling would have been part of the class curriculum.

Fiction writers couldn’t come up with these stories if they tried…

We all have our fantasy wishes, of things we would do “if I were King”. Well, here’s one fantasy come true:

A FoxNews story today reports that a state commission has voted to remove a New York judge from the bench for an incident that occurred in his courtroom in March 2005.

A phone rang while [Judge] Restaino was hearing the cases of domestic violence offenders who had been ordered to appear weekly to update the judge on the progress of their counseling. A sign in the courthouse warns that cell phones and pagers must be turned off.

“Everyone is going to jail,” Restaino said. “Every single person is going to jail in this courtroom unless I get that instrument now. If anybody believes I’m kidding, ask some of the folks that have been here for a while. You are all going.”

When no one came forward, Restaino ordered the group into custody, and they were taken to jail.

That was 46 people whom he had arrested, though all were released by late that afternoon.

Speaking for the New York Commission on Judicial Conduct, chairman Raoul Felder called Judge Restaino’s actions “two hours of inexplicable madness”.

Well, I might agree with calling it “madness” but I don’t get the “inexplicable” part.

I mean, for anyone who’s had all too many solemn occasions interrupted by idiots who can’t follow instructions to turn off their cell phones, I must say that I don’t see what is so “inexplicable” about Judge Restaino’s actions. I mean, don’t you in your heart of hearts sometime wish you could get back at these folk.

And some might even think it worth risking one’s job just for one glorious moment of righteous judgment.

On a slow news day, CNS News is carrying word that Malaysia’s national auto maker, Proton, is considering an Iranian proposal to build a car designed for Muslims, complete with a compass to indicate the direction of Mecca for prayers and a compartment to house the Koran and prayer scarves. This car, the article notes, would be intended for export.

With all the entrepreneureal enterprising spirit evident in America, it would seem clear to me that if we put our minds to it, we could come up here with some “modest” marketing improvements and enhancements that would increase functionality and boost sales.

So have at it, folks.

[Update 11-12-2007 4:41 pm]

To clarify the thrust of my post here, what I find perverse is that someone would explicitly market a car, which is after all merely a mode of transport, exclusively for practitioners of one particular religion. Can you imagine marketing a horse or a bicycle like that? Hindu ox, anyone?

I would have the same reaction if someone were to propose an Orthodox Jewish car that automatically shut down for the Sabbath, or a Christian car that automatically prevented backseat consummations unless the couple were heterosexual and legally wed to each other.

The point is that there is a disturbing trend in today’s world towards pomposity and segmentation, and the best tool to meet this threat is humor and satire, to prick the bubble and let the air out.

The Browns have been arrested.

CONCORD, N.H. (AP) - Convicted tax evaders Ed and Elaine Brown have been arrested at their Plainfield home without incident, the U.S. Marshal’s office in New Hampshire said Thursday.

The couple had been convicted on federal tax charges in January. They refused to turn themselves in to authorities when they were sentenced in April and had been holed up in their rural, fortress-like home since. It was not immediately clear how they were taken into custody.

“The Browns may now begin serving their 63-month federal prison terms,” U.S. Marshal Stephen Monier said. “High profile situations like this are always difficult, but they don’t have to be tragic. I’m glad no one was injured, and that the community remained safe throughout the operation.”

And so ends a saga here in NH- the legends are going to jail. I can’t wait to hear what really went down when this all happened.

Or as Fox News put it, Airport ‘Art’ Stunt Bombs.

An MIT student wearing what turned out to be a fake bomb was arrested at gunpoint Friday at Logan International Airport and later claimed it was artwork, officials said.

Star Simpson, 19, had a computer circuit board and wiring in plain view over a black hooded sweatshirt she was wearing, said State Police Maj. Scott Pare, the commanding officer at the airport. “She said that it was a piece of art and she wanted to stand out on career day,” Pare said at a news conference. “She claims that it was just art, and that she was proud of the art and she wanted to display it.”

Well, I guess she did stand out, alright. And she would have stood out even more had she arrived to career day in a coffin.

On the other hand, the Logan airport security force does not exactly win any prizes for alertness, which would be a concern had she been wearing an actual bomb. Ms. Simpson waltzed into the airport to an information desk asking for information on an incoming flight, having not been previously stopped. She then walked back outside, and at this point the booth attendant decided that it might be a good idea to get the attention of a state trooper standing nearby.

At that point, Ms. Simpson discovered that her “artwork” - a battery-powered rectangular device with nine flashing lights (and holding Play-Doh in her hands) - was no laughing matter:

The trooper, joined by others with submachine guns, confronted her at a traffic island in front of the terminal.

In the words of Major Pare:

“She was immediately told to stop, to raise her hands and not to make any movement, so we could observe all her movements to see if she was trying to trip any type of device,” Pare said. “Had she not followed the protocol, we might have used deadly force.” Simpson was “extremely lucky she followed the instructions or deadly force would have been used,” Pare said.

***NEWS FLASH***
Well it’s official now, Ms. Simpson has won a 2007 Darwin Honorable Mention, as recorded here:

MIT student narrowly escapes death by submachine gun.

(21 September 2007, Boston) The woman later claimed that strolling around an airport while wearing a fake bomb was “art” but this kind of artistic performance is apt to be short-lived. Particularly if you choose Logan International Airport: two of the passenger jets hijacked on 911 took off from Logan.

The student was apprehended at gunpoint, and forced to surrender her flashing circuit board and ball of Play-doh. “She’s lucky to be in a cell as opposed to the morgue,” said police

In honor of her Darwin Honorable Mention, I would present Ms. Simpson with the following consolation prize, which is modeled just below here.

…speaking of the political climate, that is.

James Taranto posted this tidbit in his column today:

Ted Grenda is downright inhospitable toward some of his neighbors, placing plywood strips with nails along his doors and windows, the Associated Press reports from Snowmass Village, Colo.:

But wildlife officials say that makes him a good neighbor to the black bears that share the mountains–especially this year, when a late freeze and drought across the West have drastically reduced their natural fare of berries and acorns. . . .

That threat of a death penalty for offending bears is why Grenda put up his home defenses, and keeps his garbage cans inside.

Honestly, when I read this last line, seeing that the dateline was from Snowmass, Colorado, I though that the community had carried political correctness over the cliff - that they actually had passed a law that people who offended bears were guilty of a capital crime - and that Mr. Grenda was so fearful of violating the law that he had nailed up his house and put his garbage cans inside. No sight, no smell - no possible offense given, I guess.

Of course, when I read the actual story, I learned that the bears were the potential offenders, not the human residents. In the course of their foraging for food, they have been walking along the town streets (and hit by cars at times) and invading houses, taking not just garbage, but also tasty treats like peaches or bags of sugar.

Colorado wildlife officers have killed at least 30 black bears this summer for having run-ins with people. Landowners defending livestock and federal agents have killed 42 more, and 29 bears were killed by vehicles. Bear mortality could rival 2002’s record total of 404. There have been at least 877 reports of human-bear encounters this year, compared with 502 for all of last year.

Bear-human conflicts have also been reported in other states, including Nevada and Utah.

Just another story of human habitation encroaching upon natural animal habitats.

Nonetheless, that I would actually seriously go down my initial trail of thought is clear evidence that something has really rotted in the political climate of our country in response to the blight of PC behavior codes and its codification into various laws. Thus a death penalty for people who “offend” bears seemed only one step over the edge rather than something beyond the pale.

Maybe Al Gore is correct about the danger of global climate change - except that it’s people like him and his acolytes who are the breeder reactors of climate change - fueled by a secular religiosity that will brook no dissent and that covers its flanks with the amulet of PC.

Meat. The food real men eat. The food real women love to marinade, spice up, grille, bake, fry…and EAT, with bare hands at times (like when you’re slighty drunk ahem)

Unless you’re a GlobalWarmingAnimalRightsFreakaZOID. Strange bedfellows.

EVER since “An Inconvenient Truth,” Al Gore has been the darling of environmentalists, but that movie hardly endeared him to the animal rights folks. According to them, the most inconvenient truth of all is that raising animals for meat contributes more to global warming than all the sport utility vehicles combined.

Uh huh.

I say, EAT THIS:

“You just cannot be a meat-eating environmentalist,” said Mr. Prescott, whose group also plans to send billboard-toting trucks to the Colorado Convention Center in Denver when Mr. Gore lectures there on Oct. 2.

I say, EAT THAT:

On its Web page and in its literature, the Humane Society has also been highlighting other scientific studies — notably, one that recently came out of the University of Chicago — that, in essence, show that “switching to a plant-based diet does more to curb global warming than switching from an S.U.V. to a Camry,” said Paul Shapiro, senior director of the factory farming campaign for the Humane Society.

(rolling my eyes)
EAT IT NOW!

Meat: May it live long and prosper, in the diets of free peoples everywhere.

I saw a picture of President Bush jogging with two recovered but obviously “handicapped” servicemen yesterday.

I got to thinking. HmmM.

President Bush #1 always seemed active: I recall watching clips of him swimming, jogging, boating, jumping out of planes— physical fitness was important to him.

Even Bill Clinton was seen jogging now and again…with his flabby gut hanging out all over the place…

So my thought is this:
WHAT if Shillary is elected?? Will she promote physical fitness? Will she walk the walk or talk the talk? Is this pasty faced, tired looking woman going to be setting the example for the people of the US?

And, can we imagine her JOGGING? What would THAT look like??

hMm.

The Voluntary Human Extinction Movement

Phasing out the human race by voluntarily ceasing to breed will allow Earth’s biosphere to return to good health. Crowded conditions and resource shortages will improve as we become less dense.