Archive for the 'Humor' Category

Ray Stevens has been in the music business for a long time. His work includes novelty songs such as The Streak and upbeat ballads such as Everything Is Beautiful. More recently, however, he has devoted his talents to opposing Obamacare.

As I contemplate the foot and half of white powdery global warm, er, climate change that fell down last weekend and now surrounds my house (and just about every house from southwestern VA to southern New England), I offer this little ditty, created by RFC radio.

The Big Picture feature at Boston.com has 120 photos looking back at the events (so far) of 2009: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Meanwhile, in other news, opinion and humor:

The Fort Hood shooting suspect’s condition has improved, enough for him to be moved from intensive care into a private hospital room.

Andrew McCarthy at National Review explains why Gitmo, contrary to what the Obama administration and Sen. Dick Durbin might think, does not cause terrorism.

A nine-ton temple pylon from the palace complex of Cleopatra has been pulled out of the Mediterrean Sea near Alexandria, Egypt.

Communists and (other) socialists protest near the climate change conference in Copenhagen, proudly carrying red flags and even a bust of Karl Marx. I wonder if they stayed around for the snow storm.

Speaking of Copenhagen and socialists, the Obama administration appears ready to offer $100 billion to a fund that would help developing nations deal with climate change.

Closer to home, Obama might be asked to testify in defense of former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich, who is accused of scheming to sell or trade Obama’s former U.S. Senate seat, campaign fundraising abuses and other offenses.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. A family in Fort Belvoir, VA sends 1550 gift bags to Iraq.

Cops in Arizona apprehend 130 drug dealers and seize $7 million in contraband.

From ARRA News Service, Senator Blanche Lincoln (D-Ark) claims that Congress can force Americans to buy health insurance.

Political cartoon – What if Rudolph the red-nose reindeer were to meet Al Gore?

Jim Treacher has the details, about a woman who showed up at the 9/12 tea party in DC. As it turns out, she even turned up in one of my pics.

Using models developed to calculate the effects of more plausible pandemics, the team from the University of Ottawa have discovered that unless man struck back quickly and aggressively then they would be doomed.

The scientific paper, which is published in a book “Infectious Diseases Modelling Research Progress”, looks at an attack by the undead creatures, who infect the living with a bite.

In their study, titled When Zombies Attack!, the researchers picked “classic” slow-moving zombies such as those in Dawn of the Dead as models and divided humanity into three: the living, zombies and the “removed” – zombies who had been killed by decapitation.

They concluded there was no point trying to cure those infected or live with them – the best thing was to destroy them as quickly as possible.

“A zombie outbreak is likely to lead to the collapse of civilisation, unless it is dealt with quickly,” they write in the book.

Which is why I’m getting prepared. All this talk of Obama and his minions pales in comparison with our eventual doom to the undead!

And here is why as Howie over at the Jawa Report so succinctly puts it:

Well of course they would, humans now adays would be too busy protesting the inhumane treatment of Zombies and accusing America of killing “civilian women and children zombies” in air strikes.

We’d implement new tactics designed to “win zombie hearts and minds” and get our ass handed to us.

Indeed. I’m sure that Obama would even host a “beers and brains” meeting for the zombies and humans to sit down and eat.. er.. discuss our differences…

by including this picture of Raven* at the beach…

(* Note: Not sure if this is Raven.)

Not so sure about her choice of beach companion however…
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(via e-mail)

One December day a married couple found an old straggly cat at their door. She was a sorry sight. Starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny, and hair all matted down. The husband didn’t feel like taking in a cat, but he and his wife both still felt sorry for her, so they put her in a carrier and took her to the vet. They didn’t know what to call her, so they named her “Pussycat”.

The vet decided to keep her for a day or so. He said he would let them know when they could come and get her. The man (a real complainer) said, “OK, but don’t forget to wash her, she stinks.” He reminded the vet that it was his wife that wanted the dirty cat, not him.

This man and the vet don’t see eye to eye. The vet calls the man “El-Cheap-O”, and the man calls the vet “El-Charge-O”. They love to hate each other and constantly “snipe” at one another, with the man getting in the last word on this particular occasion.

The next day the man had an appointment with his doctor, who is located in the same building, next door to the vet. The MD’s waiting room and office was full of people waiting to see the doctor. A side door opened and the vet leaned in – he had obviously seen the man arrive.
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Seems like a slow summer around ARS right now. No posts for almost a week… Ruh-roh! So my contribution will be this gem from “Russia’s Got Talent”.

Comparing Barack and President Sarkozy in their response to the Iran election fraud and subsequent coup d’état, were I the French parliament, I would pass a bill taking this:

and renaming it:

How far we have fallen…

Hillary Clinton made a guest appearance on This Week this past Sunday. (H/T James Taranto)

Her interview with host George Stephanopoulos gave rise to this amusing exchange:

STEPHANOPOULOS: A year ago, you bowed out of the presidential campaign, very graceful speech…. You know, it was a bitter campaign. And I’m just wondering: How did President Obama convince you to come on his team?

CLINTON: …he was quite persistent and very persuasive. And, you know, ultimately, it came down to my feeling that, number one, when your president asks you to do something for your country, you really need a good reason not to do it.

Number two, if I had won and I had asked him to please help me serve our country, I would have hoped he would say yes.

And, finally, I looked around our world and I thought, you know, we are in just so many deep holes that everybody had better grab a shovel and start digging out.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

If you say so, Madame Secretary. But may I commend to you the First Law of Holes:

When you’re in one, stop digging!